The ups and downs!!!

Well, the last two days have been full of ups and downs!!  Praises and disappointments!!  I definitely feel like I'm on a roller coaster...and I just want to get off!!

Yesterday I felt pretty great most of the day; however, I didn't get nearly as much rest as needed due to a repair man being in our house for several hours mid-day.  Once he left I was able to get a much needed shower which felt great and removed all bandages (a very nerve-wracking task) instead of just switching them out.  My skin was just getting so irritated from the tape and it felt great just letting all my skin breathe!!  I'm so thankful to have my momma here to help with all that and take care of me :o)  I know it's not an easy thing for her to watch her daughter go through, but she's been a real trooper!!

My late afternoon nap was just what I needed and I woke up around 6:30 feeling much better.  Enjoyed my dinner provided by the Osina family (Thanks, guys!), watched some Monday Night Football, took some more meds and back to sleep.  Unfortunately, I just did not sleep well.  I was so very uncomfortable and so "tense".  I went to bed looking forward to my doctor appointment set for today with the plastic surgeon as he had mentioned that I would have drains in after surgery for approximately 7 days. 

My day started off rough as I was just exhausted from "on and off" sleep all night.  Mom got the kids ready for school, which she's done all week - she's been my angel!!  I had scheduled to get my hair washed and dried by my wonderful hairdresser Jade again this morning as to just feel a little more alive since I had to actually get out in public.  I even put makeup on for the first time in over a week, which I was hoping would "pick me up", especially after getting my hair done.  I actually looked decent for a change ;-)  Unfortunately, it didn't matter what I looked like on the outside, I was struggling on the inside: mentally, physically and emotionally :-(

So off to the appointment we go with total hopes of getting my drain tubes removed as they are where most of my current pain and discomfort is coming from at this point.  Needless to say, that didn't happen and boy was I disappointed.  I know it sounds silly, but it really crushed my spirit today!!  What I thought was going to be a great appointment, turned out to be just the opposite.  There was definitely good news involved too, and I am very thankful for that!!  The details of the appointment are as follows (detailed and could be a little gross if you don't want to read):

Drains are doing their job and the fluid has decreased; however, the drainage is still red/ bloody instead of what they want to see is a more urine colored drainage and definitely nothing thick, which would mean infection.  They need the drains to remain due to the fact that with implant reconstruction, there is no natural breast tissue remaining to hold the implants as in a breast augmentation surgery; only skin which stretches.  Therefore, they have to insert an internal "bra shelf" to hold the implant.  Basically, a foreign material which they need to make sure the body will accept and not reject.  For this reason, the drains need to remain in place until they can make sure the body is "accepting" this procedure.  One more week!!  Disappointing for sure and seems like forever, but considering I was on bed rest for 3 months with each of my children, I figure this will be a piece of cake...I hope!!

The nurse noticed some fluid pockets that she tried to physically move toward the drain.  In addition, she attempted to remove the fluid with a syringe, but said she obviously did not go "far enough" in and wanted the doctor to take a look at it. He was in surgery so I head back in on Thursday for him to do that...ugghhh!!!  I did not go to this appointment thinking I was going to get prodded with more needles.  HAHA!!  Also, ended up with a phenergan shot for nausea as I had a bit of a panic attack during that little procedure.  It didn't hurt; I didn't feel a thing!!  I think it was just the thought of it all...made me sick to my stomach and made me feel as if I was going to pass out.  They informed me to make sure I was taking my valium RX, which I have not been taking.  And to definitely take it before my Thursday appointment.

My stitches were removed and just replaced with steri strips.  That process was pretty much painless and very quick.  The physician's assistant that was there and who was also present during my surgery said that everything went well in surgery and that the skin sparing and nipple sparing procedure they used was a success and that there should be no complications with that...a true blessing and praise report!!!

I have to say I could not get home from this appointment and get into my recliner soon enough.  I was totally WIPED OUT!!!  Mom made me some scrambled eggs and toast to eat and once I got that down, I took ALL MY MEDS and was OUT!!  I defintely woke up a different person :-) 

Now that dinner is done - PIZZA (thanks Lindsay and Fred) I, unfortunately, have to conquer a few things for taxes tonight as Keith heads back out of town in the morning for just a few days so it has to get done tonight.  I will then be introduced to my new pain med (got different RX today) and my new friend valium and then off to beddy bye!!  Praying for a restful night!!

Love and Belief!!

Dana